The Pike Street Press - Promo

Romantic Times Rewind: May 1994 Ads & Features


Smart Podcast Trashy Books Romantic Times RewindIn this week’s podcast episode, we’re looking at the incredible ads and features for the May 1994 issue of RT Magazine.

Thank you to Amy M. for this issue!

You can also find all the RTRW content at our category page for Romantic Times Rewind. 

And, most importantly, if you want to listen and follow along with this entry, we have more detail in the audio, but you can click play and listen and read and absorb all the visual goodness:

Ok, let’s get started!

This. Cover.

A truly epic cover. On the left is David Alan Johnson in HEAVEN with a full John Oates mullet shirtless and hairy chested wearing low slung black pants and a gun. There's a mustache. There's smoldering. Then a crown at the top on top of purple fabric, and on the right another cover model this time a photograph of another white dude with a mustache, leading a horse with a sleeveless chambray shirt open over a bare chest and with jeans and a massive belt buckle. It's just glorious.

i learned from Steve Ammidown that these were both titles from Zebra’s To Love Again line, which featured characters who were 40+. Per Steve, the hallmark of many of the To Love Again covers was mustaches. MAJESTIC levels of ‘stache.

Heaven by Bobbi Smith - A man with a truly majestic curly mullet and a BIG THICK mustache poses shirtless and hairy chestly, with a gun at his hip, against a sunset

The cover for Heaven was painted by Sharon Spiak, featuring David Alan Johnson, whom we have been calling Hot Oates.

Show Spoiler

John Oates from Hall & Oates wearing a grey jacket with no shirt, with a flaming torch burning behind him as he looks over his shoulder and smolders

Hot, smoldering Oates. You see the resemblance between Actual Oates and two-belt Heaven Oates, right?

A Bid for Love features a close up of a flower with a photo of a white man with a mustache of course leading a horse. The man is wearing a sleeveless denim shirt open with bare chest underneath and jeans with a giant belt buckle

The other model on the cover of A Bid for Love is James Fox, and both were part of the Mr. Romance pageant – one was Mr Romance Over 40, and the other was Mr. Romance Under 40.

And we learned a lot about Heaven and A Bid for Love.

The RT review for A Bid for Love: 

Yuppie love doesn’t have anything on this exceptionally well-written romance that not only steams up the glasses with its passionate love scenes but warms the heart with the depth of love, caring and commitment that the characters show for each other.

YUPPIE. LOVE.

And the cover copy for Heaven sent Amanda shopping for her own copy!

For archeologist’s daughter Alexandra Parker, the Crown of Desire isn’t just a priceless and mysterious artifactit could mean the difference between life and death. And to find it, she must embark on a dangerous journey in the company of a man she hardly trusts. Wealthy Englishman Winn Bradford is seductive, charismatic, and the last person she should fall in love with. But Alex, too, has a secretone that puts Winn’s safety at risk, and will force her to choose between loyalty and an extraordinary love. . .

Amanda has a print copy with the original cover art, and we should be hearing soon as to what she thinks.

The inside cover is very (Retcon) Romantasy:

A full page ad for Chasing the Storm by MaryLyle Rogers, which shows a white guy with a mullet and a lightning staff and a big disk belt (Romantasy belt!) while a woman in an off the shoulder pseudo-medieval gown drapes herself over his front.

Is that belt the Fantasy belt? There’s the Urban Fantasy Belt, and that’s the Fantasy belt? Check that hair. All of the hair.

We learn in this issue that Mr. Romance had REGIONAL PAGEANTS all over the US, including a weekend event in New York, and another event in Illinois, which crowned Guy de Boo as the winner.

Author Sherrill Bodine AKA Lynn Leslie poses with the romantic Frenchman who won the Mr. Illinois Cover Model Pageant, Guy de Boo She is wearing a strapless dress with a scarf and he is in a tux

Mr. de Boo is on Instagram, and was in the finals that year for Mr. Romance, according to this issue.

We talked a bit about how Romantic Times articles and features were teaching its readership how to use computers for cataloging books and for book shopping, and especially how to access and read ebooks.

Letters like this one illustrate that period of history:

COMPUTER AGE I look forward to the Janswers to Nancy Shaw's letter (RT #119) on cataloguing home romance collections on computer. I, tOO, wish that there were some good programs to help track home book collections. I hope Steven Zacharius continues his Z-Talk column. While I am not yet brave enough to sign on to a bulletin board [bbs], he makes it seem possible for a ten-thumbed person to successfully navigate the hazards of a modem. While you are considering the suggestion made by J. Mayer (RT #119), would you think about showing a little more information about previous titles? I really think it would benefit the readers and authors if you noted all previous titles (with their ratings) next to the current reviews. Joyce Smith Louisville, KY

What a compliment to Steven Zacharius, though: “…he makes it seem possible for a ten-thumbed person to successfully navigate the hazards of a modem.”

REMEMBER THE HAZARDS OF A MODEM. I surely do. Here, enjoy This Other Sound Clip:


 

Then there was this absolutely wild part. Like I can’t get over this. This is a clip from Kathryn Falk’s BIZ BUZZ column. The Harlequin Romance Report published the 10 most “desirable dates” from 1994, and we highlighted a couple things.

An excerpt from Kathryn Falk's Biz Buzz column which reads Zebra has moved to its grand new headquarters at: 850 Third Avenue, New York, NY 10022. The new telephone number is 212/407-1500. Harlequin's Romance Report is out! Guess who are the top 10 most desirable dates for 1994? One hundred lifestyles editors of newspapers from across North America voted for those they would most like to spend a romantic Valentine's Day. Women: (1) Cindy Crawford, (2) Meg Ryan, (3) Julia Roberts, (4) Michelle Pfeiffer, (5) Sharon Stone, (6) Candice Bergen, (7) Nicole Kidman, (8) Whitney Houston, (9) Janine Turner, (10) Emma Thompson. (Rumor has it that three of these women above are married to gay husbands, and vice versa!!) Men: (1) Mel Gibson, (2) Kevin Costner, (3) John Kennedy, Jr. (4) Tom Cruise, (5) David Letterman, (6) Kenneth Branagh, (7) Dennis Quaid, (8) Denzel Washington, (9) Alec Baldwin, (10) Andy Garcia. As usual, the Harlequin Report is filled with fascinating facts.

Thing the First: MANY of these “desirable dates” are very much Not Desirable now, especially on the “men” list.

Thing the Second: WHAT is Kathryn Falk doing, casually outing celebrities in the middle of this column?!

(Rumor has it that three of these women above are married to gay husbands, and vice versa!!)

What in the crispy fried fuck.

“As usual, the Harlequin Report is filled with fascinating facts.” Wowser.

Then we get to the article about David Allen Johnson and James Fox, both of whom were Mr. Romance.

Pageant Winners David Alan Johnson on Bobbi Smith's HEAVEN The first Mr. Romance Cover Model Pageant in San Diego last April created nation-wide interest among romantic-minded males who dreamed of winning the opportunity to pose on a romance novel and be a fantasy figure to millions of women. As you can see by the book covers, David Alan Johnson and James Fox are making their grand debut, and enjoying their first covers, which are about to hit the bookstands. An added note, Zebra editor, Ann LaFarge. editor of Carol Finch's book, is featured on the back cover in a romantic pose with James! How's that for an industry

Look, I have so much to add we’re going to deploy bullet points.

  • The article talks about how in addition to modeling, Johnson was a poultry inspector for the USDA.
  • From the article: “Zebra editor, Ann LaFarge, editor of Carol Finch’s book, is featured on the back cover in a romantic pose with James! How’s that for an industry perk!” Does that give you the jibblies? That gives me the jibblies.
  • Johnson is on Instagram, if you’d like to follow him.
  • He was the first Mr. Romance in 1993, and as I mentioned, there were two crowned – under 40 and over 40.
  • You can read all about him in this Austin Chronicle article.
  • You can buy a 35mm slide (SLIDE) of an image from a photoshoot:

A screengrab of an ebay listing with David Alan JOhnson in a tank top that reads HOllywood's Hottest Hunks but it's an awkward picture because his eyes are part closed. The caption reads 1996 DAVID ALLEN JOHNSON Hollywood's Hottest Hunks Model Original 35mm Slide

It’s not a great picture (his eyes are half closed it looks like) but wow. A 35mm slide! There are several on eBay from this event, it looks like. 

The middle of the magazine is just author after author introducing their new books to the readers. It’s a weird mix of yearbook entries and direct sales pitches and reader thank yous – it’s interesting.

Here is Robin Lee Hatcher’s, as an example:

ROBIN LEE HATCHER FOREVER, ROSE Leisure I'd like to thank all my readers for the wonderful response to Where the Heart Is, the - first book in the Americana series. Not only did the book hit and remain on the B Dalton, Waldenbooks, and Independent Distributor bestseller lists, but the letters from readers have been generous in their praise and great fun to read. Now I'd like to tell everyone about FOREVER, ROSE, the second book in the series. Ten years have past since we were last in Homestead, Idaho. In 1890, Homestead is the kind of place where men put down roots, where women gather for quilting bees and lively gossip, and where friends help each other through good times and bad.

Then there’s this full page ad for Topaz:

THREE SENSUOUS ROMANCES THAT WILL TOUCH YOUR HEART. "A shining talent!" -Romantic Times WILD DESIRE CASSIE EDWARDS Would the love of a gentleman-thief bring back her honor? PRINCE OF THIEVES MELINDA McRAE "A riveting, heartwarming love story." Catherine Anderson HOMEWARD HEARTS ALEXIS HARRINGTON Available in May from TOPAZ The Gem of Historical Romance.

I went to find that image in color because I had a feeling it would be great and I WAS RIGHT. This is the stepback for Wild Desire.

A Pino illustration of a man wearing an itty bitty loincloth barely on a horse while a woman is chest-deep in some very disturbed water like she's pulling him off the back of the horse. There is no explanation as to HOW he is staying on the horse because there's no saddle. I presume he has suckers on his bum.

I mean, how is he staying on that horse?

A close up of the man on the horse, fused to the back of the horse with alleged buttsuckers

Amanda is often sad that the entire magazine isn’t in color at this time, and I can see why. That’s a classic Pino illustration right there.

Adding to the “yearbook” feel of the magazine, there were a lot of ads from publishers and writer’s groups congratulating authors for their RT awards:

Their Friends in Carolina Romance Writers Congratulate: *Theresa Gladden Career Achievement Best Bantam Loveswept *Kay Hooper Career Achievement Best Futuristic Best Bantam Loveswept *B.J. James Career Achievement *Charlotte Hughes Career Achievement *Peg Sutherland Best Harlequin Superromance Good Luck in the 1992-93 Romantic Times Annual Awards!

And then there was this profile of a book club that met in a B. Dalton’s: L.O.R.E. – Literary Organization of Romance Enthusiasts, from Ft. Collins, Colorado.

Look at this cute group photo!

A group photo of the members of LORE standing together and smiling for the camera. The caption reads LO.R.E. readers include (front 1-r) Nancy Venturato, Glenna McReynolds, Branda Passow, Bridgette Harsha; (back I-r) Margaret Aunon, Lisa Kling, and Sue Harris. At right is member Vickie Mechling.

And this bit from the article about L.O.R.E. made me snort:

Characters with "dumb" names irritate these readers, it detracts from the book's overall quality when the names are unbelievable. (For example, heroes named Ziggy, Shoz, Strong O'Kelly, and Thorne just aren't okay with this group!)

Do NOT name your hero Shoz and expect L.O.R.E. to like it!

Amanda spotted this ad, and, well, yeah.

The ad text reads When fireworks light the sky, and love ignites two unsuspecting hearts, it isn't the fourth of July at all anymore... Suddenly it's THE FOURTH 0 FOREVER by Mary McBride image description in the next image.

You want to see that cover in color, right? OF COURSE YOU DO.

First, the title looks like it reads The of Fourth Forever but it’s really The Fourth of Forever.

A very muscular shirtless man with VERY LARGE ROUND PECS and shoulder length wavy hair holds a very small girl on his lap. She is leaning back to look up at him with her mouth open ( A LOT OF TEETH LIKE YIKES TEETH) but the pose is so weird like she's about to lie back and nurse or something? It's very creepy.

I felt pretty confident that this cover had won a “worst cover” award but I couldn’t find any mention of it. Maybe it was just an award inside my mind, and that is okay because I’m not wrong.

Amanda also noticed this ad for reference books:

Twilight publishing offers three of the most sought after reference books for romance! Romance by the numbers lists over 10,000 titles by series as well as by number $19.95 + s/h The Story Continues II The updated version of this popular reference book lists 1200 authors, over 6100 titles and groups books by series, spinoffs, and sagas with related characters. An asterisk is included next to series that should be read in order. 200pp double-columns! $15.95 + $3.00 s/h The Essence of Romance Includes 5000 authors listed alphabetically with their titles listed below their names according to categories, numbered series, continuing series, sequels, spin-offs, and other titles. Over 25,000 titles, 2500 authors and their pseudonyms cross-referenced - plus much more 400pp $24.95 + $3 s/h

I know that text is small, so here it is:

Twilight publishing offers three of the most sought after reference books for romance!

Romance by the Numbers lists over 10,000 titles by series as well as by number
$19.95 + s/h

The Story Continues II
The updated version of this popular reference book lists 1200 authors, over 6100 titles and groups books by series, spinoffs, and sagas with related characters. An asterisk is included next to series that should be read in order. 200pp double-columns!
$15.95 + $3.00 s/h

The Essence of Romance
Includes 5000 authors listed alphabetically with their titles listed below their names according to categories, numbered series, continuing series, sequels, spin-offs, and other titles. Over 25,000 titles, 2500 authors and their pseudonyms cross-referenced – plus much more 400pp

$24.95 + $3 s/h

In a time…before GoodReads…before the internet… we had books for $25 plus shipping and handling.

In the middle, there’s a big section of reader correspondence – but readers were sending sketches, poetry, fan messages, keeper lists with their home addresses?! This has emphatic fanzine energy.

There’s this very sweet letter and poem from the late Rose Berlin of Silver Spring:

Dear RT, I am an 80-year-old widow who loves to read historical romances. I have just finished reading your very informative and entertaining magazine and I was tempted to write. I became addicted to these novels when my sister gave me Sweet Savage Love to read, and I've been reading them ever since. They help me keep alive the memories of my own love with my husband of forty-two years. They fill my life with the romance I no longer have, and that can be a very exciting thing. My favorite heroine of all time is Leda toile of Laura Kinsale's The Shadow and the Star. I loved that book. Thank you for letting me share these thoughts. I am enclosing a poem I wrote about these stories. Handsome heroes, lovely maidens, In a world of love they dwell. Flowing from the writer's pens Oh, what stories they do tell. In all the world, in every age, Our lovers fight through thick and thin. They cast their spell on every page And in the end, they always win. Rose Berlin Silver Spring, MD

And this adorable illustrated envelope sent in with a larger illustration of a romance heroine. Noelle wrote, “I realize my lady is not well endowed enough for the usual cover, but I hope you like it in any case.”

Alas, the illustration itself was too well endowed big to be reprinted in the magazine:

Dear Noelle, We loved your sketch, but it would not fit on the page. There was room for the envelope though-your beautiful sketches made it the hit of the mailroom and the offices. We called Katherine, and told her we had heard from an artist/fan, and she was delighted. Katherine loves the ancient periods, and feels they have been neglected as settings. Readers will travel to Syria with her in her next book, WINDSONG (Dec. '94) the time period isn't as far back, but she thinks the exotic locale will be popular. The authentic, antique journals Katherine read to research this book were fascinating and added much to her excitement while writing this story.

In the response, RT mentions calling “Katherine,” by which they mean Katharine Kincaid, author of Beloved Bondage.

The cover of Katharine Kincaid's Beloved Bondage which features a chariot racing with a rearing horse a shirtless white blonde man in purple pants holding the reins with one hand and a buxom black haired woman in a yellow gown unfurling her skirt and lifting one leg. Honestly they look like they're about to get thrown out of the chariot

I’m kind of bummed that the artwork Noelle sent in wasn’t reproduced if that’s what the covers looked like! It also emphasizes the fandom focus if letters to the editor might be answered by the news that the magazine called the author on a reader’s behalf.

Amanda was VERY excited to see a crossword puzzle!

A romance novel crossword puzzle!

If you’re thinking, I want to do the crossword puzzle! I have a PDF for you! Right-click and Save-As!

I’ll put the answer key behind a spoiler tag:

The answer key for the crossword puzzle is in here!

The answer key for the crossword

The “Keeper Shelf” recs were really cute, though I clipped the image so I didn’t include the full mailing list of the people who sent in their lists:

Julie Garwood: The Prize, The Bride Jude Deveraux: The Black Lyon Suzanne Barclay: Knight Dreams Rexanne Becnel: The Rose of Blacksword Janelle Taylor: Moondust and Madness LaVyrle Spencer: Separate Beds, Morning Glory Catherine Coulter: Season of the Sun, Sherbrooke Bride Kathleen Woodiwiss: The Wolf and the Dove Marilyn Campbell: Pyramid of Dreams Judith McNaught: A Kingdom of Dreams Johanna Lindsey: Captive Bride, Prisoner of My Desire, Secret Fire, Paradise Wild, Heart of Thunder, Fires of Winter, Hearts Aflame

I imagine it was to encourage penpals but I didn’t want to put someone’s address on the site, even from back in 1994!

Here’s a triple blast from the past: Kathryn Falk was on Joan Rivers’ show “Can We Shop?” telling Lorena Bobbitt jokes.

Joan Rivers' new show, "Can We Shop," also has an "info" segment. Al t the end of February, along with Anne Murray and Oleg Cassini, Kathryn Falk appeared with a list of romance tips. She gave out recommended romance scenarios, including moonlight breakfasts, perfumed pillows, and silky lingerie, as ways to please a man. As preplanned, Joan asked at the final minute, What turns a man off? *Lorena Bobbitt jokes,." Kathryn confided as the audience howled. "Can you give us an example?" asked Joan. Did you know that Lorena is looking for a new man? But he has to he unattached!"

It was a DIFFERENT TIME.

A time of Glamour Shots™. SO many author photos are Glamour shots:

A Glamour Shot author photo with teased hair, big earrings, and shiny ruffled strapless top

So many authors photos in this issue are Glamour Shots like this one, which makes sense given that they were in so many malls, therefore easily accessible, and produced headshots that could certainly be used on a book cover.  Some authors had feather boas, some had jackets where they were holding the collar in a very jaunty fashion, but Glamour Shots for sure.

I was not immune! I had Glamour Shots done in college. I wonder if I have mine somewhere. Glamour Shots back then are like Instagram and Snapchat filters now.

Most of the magazine is newsprint (got ink all over my hands when I scanned it) but there’s a full color centerfold section with three ads, one stretching two pages for Bertrice Small’s Love Remember Me:

Illustrations of Henry VIII, probably Cromwell, for Love, Remember Me by Bertrice Small. The copy reads Blaze Wyndham's daughter, Nyssa, came to the court of Henry VIII, where she found passion, scandal and danger-and was pursued by the most notorious rake of his time, Varian De Winter, the dark and brooding Earl of March..

A full page ad for Janelle Taylor's Chase the Wind, with a glamour shot, some flowers and a picture of the book featuring the same spray of flowers. The text reads JANELLE TAYLOR SURPASSES HERSELF IN AN IRRESISTIBLE NOVEL OF SWEEPING ADVENTURE AND ENTHRALLING ROMANCE. In Janelle Taylor's sequel to her wonderful Follow the Wind, she has created an incomparable love story of two people who must battle the pain of the past to seize a radiant future. Set against a panorama of towering western history and brimming with sensual passion and intrigue, it is the tale of Special Agent Navarro Breed and his beautiful undercover partner who set off on a dangerous mission and fall in love as well.Sharon Ihle's The Law and Miss Penny features an illustration of a man in a purple shirt, mostly off his shoulders BUT STILL TUCKED IN embracing a woman with black hair and a feather and headband? And fringe? all blowing in the wind.

And then there were pages and pages about the conference.

Fabio and Topaz Man in Nashville! Friends and Fans of Fabio and Steve "Topaz Man" Sandalis are encouraged to seek out the fan club information tables at Nashville. Both these heroes are planning to be at the Booklovers Convention, and their fan clubs will have all the up-to-the minute details on where to find them! Fabio fan club buttons went fast in San Diego, and Topaz Man souvenirs were just as sought after--so be sure to get to the fan club tables at registration as quickly as you can so you don't miss anything! Fabio Fan Club President Bonnie Kuhlman and Topaz Man Fan Club President Sharon Frye promise lots of news and excitement focusing on their respective Romantic Heroes

Fabio gets to use his man but poor Steve Sandalis was “Topaz Man.”

Friends and Fans of Fabio and Steve “Topaz Man” Sandalis are encouraged to seek out the fan club information tables at Nashville. Both these heroes are planning to be at the Booklovers Convention, and their fan clubs will have all the up-to-the minute details on where to find them! Fabio fan club buttons went fast in San Diego, and Topaz Man souvenirs were just as sought after–so be sure to get to the fan club tables at registration as quickly as you can so you don’t miss anything! Fabio Fan Club President Bonnie Kuhlman and Topaz Man Fan Club President Sharon Frye promise lots of news and excitement focusing on their respective Romantic Heroes!

If you’d like to learn more about Topaz Man, Steve Ammidown wrote a brief history of him!

And the price for the convention in 1994 was not that far from what it was at the end, unless I’m mis-remembering (it’s a number, so likely).

PLAN I: Full Convention $395 Evening Welcome Party Breakfast, Seminars, Tête à Têtes, Luncheon, Mr. Romance Cover Model Pageant, and the Pageant Dinner Party Breakfast, Seminars, Tête à Têtes, Luncheon Book Fair, Costume Competition, EvENiNg IN CAMELOT Costume Dinner & Ball Breakfast, Seminars, Tête à Têtes, Luncheon, Awards Banquet The Plan I Package is available for all conventioneers, including Readers & Booksellers!

$395! with Two Fantasy Evenings!

I want to know what led to Diana Palmer taking out this ad:

Dear Readers: I'm sorry that I won't be able to attend the RT Nashville convention (I will be studving feverishly for final exams). But I hope vou all have a great time! I have been flooded with questions about "relatives" in other states. Please note that while I have many "adopted" brothers and sisters among my wonderful readers, all over the country, I know them ONLY through the mail or over the telephone, and they are not actual relations! I have only one blood relative, a sister in Atlanta. Also, I have not designated anyone to represent me in any way at conventions with the exception of mu editors. God bless you all, and I hope Nashville is a great success! Love, Diana Palmer

Diana had people posing as her family? What?!

ANOTHER CRUISE!!

A 12 day cruise! Voyage with CIJI WARE Celebrated Historical Novelist - to the BRITISH ISLES ABOARD Holland America's ms Statendam JUL. 21 - AUG. 2, 1994 Walk in the footsteps of a Scottish Duchess and experience the tragic romance between Marie Antoinette and her handsome Swedish Count as your luxury liner makes stops at the colorful. romantic, ports used by European Royalty from Copenhagen. Denmark to the Wicked world of 18th Century London. 12 EXCITING DAYS $3210 PRIOR TO MAY 1, 1994 CALL FOR DETAILS ADAMS WORLD CRUISE SPECIALISTS LAGUNA BEACH, CA 92651 714/497-9379 800/240-2144

Seriously, cruises were the THING. I’ve seen more influencers booking travel with fans lately, especially on Instagram, so nothing is truly new, but author cruises really seemed to be a frequent event.

And, hello, Brenda Jackson has arranged a new reader cruise for readers in 2025! Author Cruises are coming back! (I love this so much.)

Look at these abridged audiobooks. I should put a content warning on this section because my hair is standing on end.

An ad for romance audiobooks on cassette - ABRIDGED to 90 minutes! A Gentle Giving by Dorothy Garlock $5.99 bridged to 90 min PIRATE by Fabio $5.99 Abridged 90 minutes Timeless Passion by Constance O'Day Flannery - NINETY MINUTES. Something Wonderful by Judith McNaught NINETY MINUTES?! The Pirate and the Pagan by Virginia Henley, abridged 90 minutes. WHAT DID THEY CUT OUT. ALL OF IT?

Something Wonderful, by Judith McNaught.  The Pirate and the Pagan by Virginia Henley. ABRIDGED to NINETY MINUTES. How?!?!

And then, this ad brought us so much joy, and WE get to share it with YOU.

Fabio Fever the book - Fabio the Biography by Peter Paul $7.95 A deluxe trade papaerback with over 140 photographs of FABIO! The MUSIC Fabio After Dark Music Cassette A selection of Fabio's favorite romanse tunes make for a perfect romantic evening. Between songs, Fabio whispers, croons, and lulls you into romantic oblivion. Don't miss his signature song, When somebody Loves Somebody." The BODY Fabio Fitness FABIO: FITNESS Exercise Video $19.95 Let Fabio show you how to develop a strong, fit body with his at-home exercise program developed by fitness expert Brenda Dygraaf. THE HEART FABIO: A TIME FOR ROMANCE Fantasy Video-$19.95 The first Video Novel™ ever created stars Fabio as the hero of a romance novelist's fantasies. He appears as a Pirate, a Viking, and an Italian Count.

The MUSIC Fabio After Dark Music Cassette

A selection of Fabio’s favorite romance tunes make for a perfect romantic evening. Between songs, Fabio whispers, croons, and lulls you into romantic oblivion. Don’t miss his signature song, “When Somebody Loves Somebody.”

FABIO Whispers, croons, and lulls you into romantic oblivion!

Since this was an audio CD, Elijah M, bless every bit of his heart, uploaded a mix of Fabio visuals, but they’re on repeat so you can just…listen. Or be lulled into romantic oblivion.

I wonder if I put this on in the kitchen while I’m cooking, which of the humans of my household will wander in and ask me what the hell I’m listening to.

Then there’s the workout video, FABIO: Fitness.

Prepare for some aerobic steps, neon, and some very high cut leotards on everyone involved.

But then there’s THE VIDEO NOVEL.

FABIO: A TIME FOR ROMANCE
Fantasy Video-$19.95
The first Video Novel™ ever created stars Fabio as the hero of a romance novelist’s fantasies. He appears as a Pirate, a Viking, and an Italian Count.

Here’s the whole video:

 

I have this clip below set to play at a specific point, and there’s a lot of squealing and shrieking, because FABIO is…about to put his sword down the front of her dress?

Just…puts the sword down her cleave.

There’s also some chess set to Pachelbel’s Canon in D, some pirates, a LOT of wind machine, and I kinda want to know what bathrobe the romance novelist in the movie is wearing because it’s very comfy looking.

So! Those were our favorites from the Ads and Features from RT’s May 1994 issue! What a time was had by all.

Our next episode will be one of five issues I’ve put up for a vote on our Patreon.

And remember, if you join the Patreon, you’ll get access to the entire issue as a PDF.

What do you think? Are you lulled into romantic oblivion? (I hope not.) Which of these books do you remember?





Source link

About The Author

Scroll to Top